Ego

I'm caught up in the everyday trend Tied up by invisible thread Walking down a razor-thin edge And I wake up tired, think I'm better off dead Been a few months since I crossed over state lines Talk to my mom, fake smiles over FaceTime Drink all night 'til I can't walk a straight line Feel so low, but I'm high at the same time I can't keep my feet on the ground And I'm nervous what you'll think of me now I'm hoping that someone comes around And helps me figure it out (over there? Okay) I think that I should try to kill my ego 'Cause if I don't, my ego might kill me I'm all grown up, but somehow lately I'm acting like a fucking baby I'm really not as happy as I seem Still a little kid that can't make friends Wanna be invited, but I won't attend I been having bad dreams, my career could end Because I slip up when I should've played pretend Turned 18 and I left the city I said, "I wanna be cool, I don't wanna be pretty" Voices all came crashing down And said, "You're too nice to run this town" I can't keep my feet on the ground And I'm nervous what you'll think of me now I'm hoping that someone comes around And helps me figure it out (are you gonna be that honest? Okay) I think that I should try to kill my ego 'Cause if I don't, my ego might kill me I'm all grown up, but somehow lately I'm acting like a fucking baby I'm really not as happy as I seem Nothing's as it seems Yeah, nothing's as it seems And I'm all grown up but somehow lately I'm acting like a fucking baby I'm really not that happy being me I don't like the lie I'm living I'm way too nice and too forgiving I wanna go back to the beginning When it all felt right A rooftop, Lower East Side, I'm singing Didn't give a fuck if I was winning It's all done now, so who am I kidding? I'm doing way worse than I'm admitting I think that I should try to kill my ego 'Cause if I don't, my ego might kill me I'm all grown up, but somehow lately I'm acting like a fucking baby I'm really not as happy as I seem Nothing's as it seems Yeah, nothing's as it seems And I'm all grown up, but somehow lately I'm acting like a fucking baby I'm really not that happy being me