My Disguise

There is nothing like the unfamiliar air It brings me back to when this all made sense Bitter, depressed, staring back at death I'm pushing myself to the edge over what happens next The pain, the cost, destruction of the thought To take account for everything that I've lost The change we sought compelling us to rot I never said I'm the only one Fight till there's nothing left You have much more to give You owe it to yourself, you owe it to yourself There's nothing wrong with asking for help In my head I rewind, falling away from my disguise, am I dead or lost in time? I'm trying to read through the feelings that lead me to the light We say we feel alright while we starve to feel alive In my head I rewind, falling away, away, away from my disguise Yeah, there's nothing there to hold me back I'm not defined by the things I lack I often think of the nights I stared into your eyes And you would tell me what it's like to want to die I have the heart to forgive, but how could I forget The way you shut me out when I chose to let you in? Fight till there's nothing left You have much more to give You owe it to yourself, you owe it to yourself There's nothing wrong with asking for help In my head I rewind, falling away from my disguise, am I dead or lost in time? I'm trying to read through the feelings that lead me to the light We say we feel alright while we starve to feel alive In my head I rewind, falling away, away, away from my disguise Though we struggle, I trust That this war is not the end My curse is not my crutch My curse is not my crutch, oh I often think of the nights I stared into your eyes And you would tell me what it's like to want to die But now I know how you felt when you recalled those days You almost left this place, I finally feel your pain The pain, the cost, destruction of the thought To take account for everything that I've lost The change we sought compelling us to rot I never said I'm the only one We say we feel alright while we starve to feel alive In my head I rewind, falling away, away, away from my disguise